Saturday, June 23, 2012

Life Gets in The Way

Hello lovely blog readers (assuming I have any left),

I am sorry I have not written in so long.  My life has literally flipped itself upside down in the past couple of weeks (although that is not a valid excuse for not having written in over six months - sorries!).  I guess sometimes life just gets in the way of doing things you wish you had more time to do.

So update: the boy has graduated, commissioned into the Navy, and moved to Florida.  Two weeks from today I will go to Florida to move into the first house that will truly be "ours", over a thousand miles away from my family.  I am terrified.  I am also excited.  He has been gone for two weeks and I feel like I am missing part of myself.  I also feel like when I move to Florida to follow him (as I always knew I would), I will find that part of myself I have been missing.  In the same breathe, I will also start missing part of myself I have never had to miss before.  I understand that we all grow up and move away from our families, but I am not sure that, even at 25, I am ready for that.  I don't want to leave the comfort zone I have called my life.  I love these people more than they know and I am afraid of what it means to start a life more than a car ride away from them.  I know I can do it, and I know that the boy is worth it, but it is still terrifying.

Today would have been my grandmother's 86th birthday.  Would have been.  She died about a week ago.  I know she is having a better birthday where she is now then she ever would have had here, but it is still a terrible thing to know she is not in the world anymore.  The absolute terrible part? I didn't cry at her funeral.  I have cried so much since leaving PA and my extended family, but while I was there, I don't think I actually shed a single tear.  My eyes welled up, and I was sad, but I did not cry. And I honestly think Grandma would be angry with me for crying now.  She told me once: "When I'm gone, don't be sad.  I had a good life.  I loved every minute of it.  I love you.  I'm going to a better place.  I'll see you again."  I miss her.  I miss her more than I thought I would.  I didn't see her regularly because she lived so far away and I guess part of me assumed that it would be that kind of missing her when she died.  It's not.  It's nothing like that.  It's awful.  She was an amazing woman who left us with an awesome legacy of love.  I only hope that I can set the example for my children and grandchildren that she set for me.

Onto happier things (which is exactly what Grandma would have wanted) - I got a job.  A real live, honest to goodness, oh gracious I am working for a law firm, job.  I even get to take it with me to FL when I go in two weeks.  EXCITING!

I have managed to keep ONE of my new year's resolutions and not eat meat that I don't know where it came from.  I actually went almost completely vegetarian for a while because I couldn't get a hold of meat that I was willing to eat.  Then I realized I don't really need (read "like") meat.  The boy was not happy about this but I have managed to fix him a few meals that he did not realize did not include any type of animal protein.  Yay me!  We will have to find a happy balance in our relationship (since he is an avid meat eater and I am clearly not) but we can manage.  He is willing to respect how I feel about meat, and I am willing to prepare it for him, so I think we will be okay. 

I think that this has officially become a long enough update about my life.  I am sure no one has missed my rambling blog posts, and I can't promise there will be more of them, but I will try. 

Kisses and hugs!

Saturday, December 31, 2011

Old Year/New Year


Chocolate Milk
Garage Porn
Taking the Bar
Moving, moving, moving
Flight slot
First "official" Christmas together
Job/Job Hunting
Attempt at vegetarianism
Beer Bread
Learning to be flexible
Passing the Bar
Wine/Game Nights
Football/Hockey/Basketball/Sports in general
The Italian
Halloween (Arrrr!)
Cookie Bake
Alcoholic Arnold Palmer's
Electronic Cigarettes
Law School Friends Family
Visits from the Brother
Lion King
Christmas Town
Gym membership
Waffle House
Feb Club
Six years
Nags Head
Car Accidents
Pampered Chef
Wedding Dress Shopping
Wedding Dress Buying
First big purchase - Chevy Silverado
New friends
Old friends
Peanut Butter and Jelly
Wedding Planning
Red Heads
Farmer's Markets
Puppy Playdates
Public Defense
Learning to Let Go
Slowing Down
Ride Along
Research Projects
And so much more!! There is so much that I just know I have forgotten, so I may be adding to this list.  Thank you to everyone who made this year better than the last! Love, love, love you all!! :)

These are the big things that will happen in 2012 and my resolutions.
Flight School
Tons of Weddings
Vegetarianism (and not just when it is convenient)
Going to the gym
Running again
Biking again
Reading more
Job Hunting
Writing Letters (like real letters)
Post Secret project
Be more crafty
Less TV
Less Facebook, more face time
Seven Years
Getting a puppy(?)
Dancing Lessons
Cooking classes
And who knows what else?

Happy New Years everyone! It has been one hell of a year.  2012 is shaping up to be a year of change, happiness, and beauty.  No matter what happens to you this coming year I hope that you remember that you can control only one thing: your attitude.  Stay positive, stay healthy, and above all, love and let yourself be loved.

Christmas Cards and NYE

My craft project was a success! Yay! (Although taking pictures of the cards was an abysmal failure).  I actually managed to make Christmas cards for everyone! :) They were cute (and I had help).  I feel super accomplished.  Haha.  I am now working on creating my wedding invitations.  I doubt I will be making them though; I think I will just order them.

I am working on a New Years post.  I want to sum up my year and write up my resolutions. We'll see how long it actually takes me get it done. :)

Happy New Years everyone!! Love, love, love.

Tuesday, December 20, 2011


I am not a terribly crafty person but I think the Christmas card selection this year is abysmal. As a result, I think I am going to make Christmas cards this year. And if that goes well, I am going to make our wedding invitations (although, to be honest, I think that is putting the cart before the horse). I'll let you know how it goes.

Monday, December 19, 2011

Terrible Blogger

Merry Christmas everyone!!

So I was terrible about posting what I was grateful for. It's not because I don't have a ton of things to be grateful for, it's just because I don't blog often enough.  To be honest I am blogging right now because I am sitting in the waiting room of a dealership waiting for the boys truck to get detailed. I am writing this post on my phone. Ahhh technology.

Anyways, I am currently unemployed and enjoying my time with my fiance and family. I am praying I have a job by January so I can get back onto the sacking track. I would like to be making money but I am very grateful for my time with my family. I am not going to have a lot once I move to Florida.

Speaking of which, the boy got a flight spot so we will be moving to Florida next summer after our wedding. I am super excited about this next chapter. I think it is going to be awesome. Feel free to come visit us! I am sure during his training/deployments I am going to need the company!!

Alright, I think that is enough for now. Again, Merry Christmas everyone!! Cherish the time you have with your families and remember what this season is all about (and no, it's not the gifts...haha.)

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Days Off

I am grateful for my impromptu day off.  I managed to get most of my errands run, the floor of my apartment swept, two hours of cardio in at the gym.  It was nice.  And tomorrow morning, if all goes well, I will get to sleep in and then go to work around 10.  And if things don't get well, I will have another day off. :)

Monday, November 7, 2011

Missed a day


I am grateful for my mom.  Today she came up to visit me and to go dress shopping with me.  She paid for my wedding dress!! It will be here on February 20, 2012.  I am so flipping excited.  I am grateful for her for so many more reasons than just this one.  It is just a perfect example of how lucky I am to have my mother.  She is an amazing, beautiful, strong, loving, intelligent person who has molded me into everything I am.  No matter how bad her day has been she will listen to me whine about the insignificant things happening in my life.  She is willing to do whatever I need, with no question of the cost to herself.  She is an epic woman and I am blessed to call her mommy.  I love you!!

I am also grateful for late night talks.  They always make things seem less terrible.  Tomorrow is always a new day, and no matter what, I know that I never have to face the challenges that are waiting for me alone.  There is also someone there who is willing to reach out and take my hand.  I am so blessed to have my life filled with such wonderful and caring people.  I wouldn't be able to survive without them.